When a stranger ask u to get married

25 Sept 2018

So that was the moment when he asked me to be his wife. No. There was no such cool phrase of 'will you marry me? Or let's get married or would you love me?' it was just, 'jum jadi my wife'. Though some might interpret that as the same. Sigh😩

At that time I was so terrified. I was wondering why he so random to just ask someone stranger to be his wife without explaining anything why he did that. I was thinking he must be that kind of desperado to just ask anyone to be his wife. I did thought of maybe he is a gay or something, he must really have to get married as soon as possible to hide his identity. Because I've heard a lot of stories on socmed (poor me-keep on negative thinking😣)

When I looked into his photos 🙈he is so handsome that I keep talking to myself, he has everything, the look, the way he was in photographs like he was so perfect (he must so lonely-attention seeker maybe?)

I also think that, he was a scammer. But why?  I didn't do anything wrong.  Why he want to play with my ♥.  All I have is just a piece of ♥ that I want to give it to someone Limited Edition - special💖

Ok go away all the negative thoughts. So I have decided, let's ask Allah what is the best for me. I think HE hasn't answer me yet what HE really want me to do. I'll just being me and keep moving on. Let's go on😉

And.. The reason is me.!

I'm sorry for not being perfect for you.. I'm sorry that I'm lacking in every way.. I don't want to be in ur way of finding ur happiness anymore.. Because,  I've realized that no matter where u are,  who you're with,  what u're doing,  I will always, completely, truly,  honestly,  love you..  I just want you to be happy coz u deserve it😊

I chose not to be angry,  I chose not to be mad,  I chose not to keep holding on you,  when I knew that your heart is not belong with me anymore.. Just know that,  you're the best thing that ever happend to me.. I choose for you to be happy even though its break my heart.. At this moment of time, the quotes of loving doesn't mean belonging.. I do agree😉

Yes I do want you to be guilty for the whole of your life for breaking my heart..but, as for myself I just want to live my life once again though its not gonna be the same again.. And I'll keep moving on.. I want to be happy too..

Mimpi itu...

Salam maaf Hijrah..

Subuh ini aku terjaga dari mimpi indah.. Mimpikan dia..aku taktau kenapa aku asyik mimpikan dia..nak kata aku terfikirkan dia, memang idokler.. Aku suka Dia tp just Suka gitu jelaa tapi takdelah sampai sebelum tidur tu terfikirkan dia ke apa..takde masa aku nak fikir pasal dia sebab aku tau kami bagai langit dan bumi..mak aku selalu cakap Enggang dengan pipit memang Takkan Dapat terbang sama tinggi duduk sama rendah..memang taraf manusia itu sama je Di sisi tuhan yang memebezakan hanya keimanan tapi membayangkan untuk bersama Di kalangan orang macam tu pun dah mnakutkan..maybe sebab aku suka sangat dengan lagu antara dua darjat..kami Takkan Mungkin bersama..tapi yang aku tak faham tu kenapa aku asyik mimpi pasal Dia... Most of the time dalam mimpi tu, dia tak bercakap pun dengan aku Dan aku pun takkan pandang Dia.. It's just that aku n Dia berhampiran satu sama lain. Mimpi tu selalu datang before subuh atau masa waktu subuh..Kadang2 tuk x membuatkan aku terawang-awangan aku selalu cakap pada hati aku, 'mimpi tu just Mainan tidur je tau,  tuk ko bangun awal,  dah jangan bagi harapan palsu,  Jom sambung tidur..' hiks 😂 apa2 pun bila mimpi dia, it's really made my day 😝