Tuesday, 30 October 2018

Take it or leave it - simple

"U siapa nak paksa2 I?" Faris hanya memandang Hana kaku. Jujur dia tidak menyalahkan Hana atas apa yang berlaku. Semuanya hanya tindak balas spontan Hana. "I deserve someone better. Siapa u untuk ajar I. I don't want to be ur spare part or any part of your life."

If u are not capable enough to meet my standards,  it's not my fault. Well I don't have to lower my standards just because u cannot exceeding it. I should have never do it just because to accommodate any man. Who r u to judge and tell me what to do. I've been living good all this while before u came to my life to ruin it. I don't have to be someone else. If I don't reach ur expectations then just leave me alone. I don't need someone who's trying to make me feel bad. If u really love me,  then u must accept me as who I am. And later if I love u, I'll be someone who u want me to. But right now,  I don't even love u but u trying to make me look like a fool.. Or should I say,  don't act like an idiot and just move on..

what a drama u r looking for just because u r not used to someone extraordinary. Pipit sama pipit,  Enggang sama Enggang. Kalau tak sehaluan usah dibahas dan dipaksakan 😏

Thursday, 25 October 2018

Can't help falling in love with you 😉

Wise men say
Only fools rush in
But I can't help falling in love with you
Shall I stay?
Would it be a sin?
If I can't help falling in love with you

Like a river flows, surely to the sea
Darling so it goes, some things are meant to be

Take my hand
Take my whole life too
For I can't help falling in love with you

Like a river flows, surely to the sea
Darling so it goes, some things are meant to be

Can't help falling in love with you 😉

Wise men say
Only fools rush in
But I can't help falling in love with you
Shall I stay?
Would it be a sin?
If I can't help falling in love with you

Like a river flows, surely to the sea
Darling so it goes, some things are meant to be

Take my hand
Take my whole life too
For I can't help falling in love with you

Like a river flows, surely to the sea
Darling so it goes, some things are meant to be

Bila cinta manusia melebihi cinta pada Pencipta

Ada sebab sesuatu terjadi, ada sebab sesuatu perlu pergi, ada sebab sesuatu tidak ditakdirkan menjadi milik kita.

Sedih. Pedih. Cuma tuhan yg tahu apa yang ada dalam hati setiap hambaNya. Dia pergi di saat kau meminta pada tuhan yang terbaik. Dia pergi sebab bukan dia yang terbaik itu. Kadang 'some people that u wish to be a part of ur stories are only meant to be a chapter of ur stories😊'

Move on. It's not that easy. Especially when he was the first. The first that I wish to be the special last was only meant to be persinggahan yang sementara. Sementara sangat. Tapi yang sementara itu sangat memberi impak yang mendalam. He is not that special but he left a scar to my ♥.

Benarlah Islam tidak menggalakkan bercinta. Sebab?  Bila terbiasa bercinta kita akan jadi membandingkan. Tipulah kalau tak rasa diri ini bodoh. Yes I was so stupid to let him stay and affected me so bad. We didn't do anything wrong. We didnt do anything unusual. But I did feel that he was belong to me. Only that. But now he is gone and I got to move on.

But one thing for sure, sepanjang kami 'bercinta' even though not too long, (that I'm sooo thankful to Allah)  I feel so attach to Allah that I keep asking HIM whether he is the right one. We are good at planning but Allah is a great planner in this universe. I ask HIM so many times dalam pada I sibuk bercinta dengan si dia, I ask HIM so desperately if he was meant to be my destiny, ease us in our way of finding HIM. I also ask for my mom's dua. 'kalo jodoh dekat2 kan, kalo bodoh jauh2 kan'😂

I ask for the best and he is not the best one. I keep telling myself that 😭. Of course it's hurt. But at least I got to experience, 'makan tak kenyang, tidur tak lena, mandi basah lah jugak'😇 it takes time to heal but I believe with the god plan. He save me the best maybe not in this world but there after inshaa Allah.

So bila mana kita meletakkan sesuatu melebihi cinta kepada Allah, HE doesn't like it so HE removes it. Because HE knows well the 'thing' that he removed was the bad thing.

But, I still have a  H I G H  H O  P E S....😞

Monday, 22 October 2018

Can't help falling in love with you 😉

Wise men say
Only fools rush in
But I can't help falling in love with you
Shall I stay?
Would it be a sin?
If I can't help falling in love with you

Like a river flows, surely to the sea
Darling so it goes, some things are meant to be

Take my hand
Take my whole life too
For I can't help falling in love with you

Like a river flows, surely to the sea
Darling so it goes, some things are meant to be

Saturday, 6 October 2018

Happy Birthday to uS

7th October 2018

Why him?  Among all of those guys.. He is not that special.. Adakah dia lelaki kiriman Tuhan? Adakah dia jodoh atau bodoh? Aku sendiri tidak tahu.. Aku tanyakan pada tuhan lalu dia hadirkan Ilham.. Kata ustaz,  dalam konteks agama tiada istilah 'jodoh belum datang'. Sepanjang kehidupan manusia, sebenarnya telah banyak dikirim tuhan cuma manusia itu sendiri yang menolak. Yang hitam datang tak mahu,  yang putih datang tak mahu, yang kurus datang tak mahu, yang gemuk datang tak mahu.. Lalu mahunya apa? yang menolak itu manusia itu sendiri.

Ada yang kata jodoh datang di saat yg tepat..aku sendiri kurang pasti adakah sekarang adalah waktu yang tepat..aku sendiri takut nak mencuba.. Aku tidak tahu harus berbuat apa.. Kata ustaz lagi,  'hidup ini ada sebahagiannya adalah hasil pilihan kita sendiri, kita yang memilih mahu yang bagaimana..kita sendiri yang menentukan hidup kita arahnya bagaimana..cuma kalau keliru minta lah petunjuk dari Tuhan, Dia akan berikan jawapan. '

Aku bertanya pada Dia, aku meminta pada Dia, jika ini takdir yang harus aku jalani, aku kena kuat dalam pilihan aku sendiri. Yang salah adalah aku,  yang betul juga pilihan aku.. Aku tak boleh salahkan Sesiapa..aku  yang memilih jalan ini.. Kata sahabatku, setiap pilihan ada risikonya..mungkin apa2 pun risiko yang terbentang..aku harus kuat dalam pemilihan ku sendiri..tetapi tidak terlalu terlambat untuk terus berdoa kerana Allah sentiasa ada untuk hamba2Nya..

Jadi aku memilih dia..sekiranya Dia adalah yang terbaik untukku,  agamaku,  dunia dan akhiratku, Akibat perbuatanku samada cepat atau lambat maka permudahkanlah urusan pernikahan kami dan kurniakanlah sakinah,  mawaddah Dan Rahmah Di dalamnya..Sesungguhnya Engkau Maha Mengetahui dengan ilmuMu yang Maha Besar..

Walaupun pada awalnya kami hanya bergaduh sepanjang masa dan seakan tiada kompromi antara satu sama lain, aku perlu yakin dengan ketentuanNya..apa2 pun aku percaya ini adalah takdir terbaik dariNya..aku akan cuba jalani seadanya.. BTW Happy Birthday to both of us.. We share a same date of birth cuma berbeza tahun..

Satu hal yang membuatkan aku terfikir mungkin kah dia pasangan yang tercipta untukku di dunia ini kerana sepanjang 26 tahun aku hidup di bumi Tuhan ini, ini adalah kali pertama aku bertemu seseorang yang memiliki tarikh lahir sama sepertiku..paling ajaib lelaki ini tidak pernah aku kenali dan dia datang di saat hati ini kosong sekosong hening pagi..

Kalau pun dia cumalah persinggahan di hati ini, aku harus sentiasa bersangka baik dengan Allah, Dia yang menentukan apa yang terbaik untuk hamba2Nya..pilihan aku adalah dia, tinggal hanya restu dari pemilik hati kami berdua..Allah yang Satu, yang sentiasa ada dalam hatiku😊 semoga yang terbaik jadi milik kami berdua 😇

Dan di mana jua dia berada, semoga Hidayah Allah sentiasa bersamanya..

Present for a special friend

This is the first present that I give to someone special.. I don't know if I'm being too stupid or what.. I guess I m blind now..Do I have to sacrifice this far to someone stranger? I don't know.. I'm not pure in heart anymore to let someone stranger entering my heart and let him do anything he want in order to just gain his trust and love.. I don't know if I'm doing the right thing..

Then I was thinking.. This is what I chose..I'm not happy yet I will consider him as just a special friend of mine.. If anything happen, I cannot regret because every path that I have to go through at this moment is a path that I've chose in the first place.. I'm the one who choose to be in this situation so I have to bear it..

Im the one who chose to fell in love before marriage so I have to make this sacrifice..im the one who has to pay for the price of trust.. So I cannot regret..the most important thing is, he came in my heart with a hope.. But to live a normal life I cannot wish anything magic to happen.. I cannot hope for someone..only Allah knows the best..so I just go with the flow.. Let HIM decides what is the best for me..

Please my heart,  do not let just anyone entering your heart..